Men, Women, and the Ability to Move On

I've never quite understood why it's always so easy for a man to walk away from a relationship, yet so hard for us. Some think that it's because women dive into situations with their feelings and emotions head first while men take months or even years to express those feelings and emotions, or even realize that they have them. Some think that it's because he never really cared about that particular woman in the first place. But regardless of whether it's one of those reasons or the other, my question is, why is it so easy for men to completely disregard the feelings of us women anyway? Why is it so easy for them to just completely throw away something after having put a given amount of time into it?

I write my blogs only when inspired. As the title of my blog states, I write about my trials, my tribulations, and my life-- whether it be something that has affected me directly, or something that I see affecting someone that I care about. My last blog entry was inspired by both: by how I currently feel, and from what I've been witnessing lately, is the way a lot of women feel. It all boils down to one thing-- how we are being and how we have been treated by men, and how we always seem to be the only ones left picking up the pieces and struggling to move on. Now this blog isn't meant to be a male-bashing entry or anything of the sort, but this one is solely for the ladies to relate to and for you fellas to comment on. All we want to know is, why is it so easy for you to act the way you do? To live life every day, acting as if you don't care (and we know you do...you're just better at concealing it) and that feelings are never an issue? To jump from woman to woman, claiming that you are "emotionally unavailable" and unwilling to love? To take full advantage of a woman's feelings for you and use them for your own personal and physical benefit? To be here one day, and gone the next? Why is all of it okay to you? What about us? What about our thoughts...our feelings...our hearts?

Putting myself out there for a moment: I've been in situations where I've spent days, weeks, or even months crying my eyes out over a guy who had just randomly walked out of my life, while he seemed to move on the following day (if not immediately), never look back, and be just fine. I didn't understand it, but eventually learned to accept the fact that it wasn't meant to be, and that he apparently just wasn't into me as much as I was him. But one situation in particular I found (and still do find) extremely difficult to understand. Me and this guy started out just friends...hanging out, going on "dates", and having fun. After a few months, things got a little more intimate, and although we had not established a relationship, we remained cool. But eventually things took a turn for the worst. We went through many "on and off" periods where we would talk, then don't talk. Ultimately things turned ugly, with the end result being him completely turning his back on me and ending up in a relationship with someone else. It hurt like hell, and I will never forget that day. But I finally came to terms with myself and thought, okay fine. Him and I aren't meant to be...they obviously are. But even if him and I did not work out from a relationship standpoint, what happened to the friendship we had developed? What happened to all of the talks we had...the good times we shared...the laughing, and joking...the times I was there for him and him for me? Was he really just going to throw it out the window and proceed to treat me like a complete stranger? Well, he did...and did so without any regret or remorse. The almost 2-year friendship I THOUGHT we had built was gone, just like that. It's been months since we've spoken so much as one word to each other, and that alone hurt me more than him breaking my heart. I will NEVER understand Why it had to end that way. I mean, I knew he loved her, but did our friendship really mean nothing for him to just let it all go so easily?

I know that us women are to blame for a lot of what we put ourselves through-- we often have the inability to see the truth when it's right in front of us, we have the constant tendency to only hear what we want to hear and twist everything men do and say to fit to our liking and what we want to hear, and we also have the tendency to hold onto a failing or failed relationship, with the hope that we can somehow convince him that we are "the one". We are wired completely differently when it comes down to love and relationships. But regardless of our emotional differences, we all have feelings. Yes, we know you guys have feelings too-- so why is it a sin to express those feelings and love back? You know that us women love hard, have delicate feelings, and want to do nothing but give you the deepest of our love and affection. So why is that so hard to reciprocate if you know you feel the same way? For those who don't feel the same way, why is it so hard for you at least understand what we go through and try to respect those feelings as you part ways?

What goes around comes around, so next time you're walking away from a situation in a woman, why not ask yourself, how would you feel if a woman you cared about-- truly cared about-- just picked up and walked away, showing no remorse or paying no mind to everything you thought you had built?